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was at the club with the brosky last night, sipping on that water cause we're all cycling on some celltech shit.

then i notie there's someone recording me with his cellphone using his flash, look at him its some skinny 120lbs 6feet tall somalian fggt that used to annoy me on another board i visit.

mothafucka been starving for month he's all bone and flesh, my guns are larger than his chest, so i laugh a bit, start flexing and shit, it goes for like 30 seconds or so, guy keep recording...

friends arent sure what's going on so they step aside so they dont get recorded, lil fucker turn his cellphone to catch them. So walk his way, tell him to stop it, guy laught at me and say he know the bouncers and he doesnt care.

G mothafucking G

enough, grab his phone, kid is yelling and waving at the bouncers, so im like "whachu gunna do now fggt?"

crack the mothafucking cellphone with one hand, showing off dat dere grip strenght of a saiyan prince, the Farking bouncer that was on his way to help anorexic obama kinda stop and look at me confused. cant belive i just smashed a cellphone with my fingers, look at my broskinos, all 200lbs+ 6 feets 6%bf shredded and tanned sickmuthafuckaz.

nod at me like "GG do your thing i dont care about this fggt anyway lolol"

kid is crying and trying to bitch slap me or some shit, not sure what to do atm, cant really punch that non-homosexual fggt since he got like BMI of 5 or so lol, could probably die or end up cripple.

so i go back to the broz and drink some more water

then there it is, shit get real, black kid pulled out a knife and is coming at me, friend is like "watch out bitch scalpel" so i turn around, fucker try to stab me in the abs, blade deflect on my oblics and break.

kid looking confused as ****, friends and bouncers are loling and mirin, so i pick that scrub by the collar and proceed to do some 1 hand front shoulder raise with his excuse of a human body, end up throwing him over my head up in the Farking speaker, hit his head and fall down on the floor in convulsion throwing up and shit with eyes flipping out like he's on some good mdma trip.

girls are all mirin and excited about what just happenned got some nice 9.5+ coming at me and feeling my abs of steel asking me how i broke the blade and shit, so we just get a sit and keep sipping our water as the kid is pissing on himself on the floor dying and shit with the bouncer laughing and instagraming pics of that swaggot.

you should put all this shit in a memoir one day

Just.. Meh!

Hm, 4-5/10. You had better stories.

Need pics.

I was too lazy to read past the 3rd sentence. It's late anyways.

Awful, could at least try to have some semblance of reality to it.

Where's the realism Vegeta? I mean I could see a blade snapping on your bare chest (bear chest?!!!), I can see someone crushing a phone with just one hand. But drinking water at a club?! That's too crazy for me to ever believe!

Like I said last time, you're trying way too hard. Telling us stories that are actually true and not exaggerated is a lot funnier. Oh wait...

lol

Meh, 5/10. Was waiting for a better punch line than "fucker try to stab me in the abs, blade deflect on my oblics and break".

7/10, more of this sheet please.

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