Why.........

Orilana · **Joined:** Apr 2007 **Posts:** 267 **Location:**

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every two hours?

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries
are flat?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars,
but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw
a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

What is the speed of darkness?

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as
cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing
here?

Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem
longer?

Do you cry under water?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be
a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in
binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Did you ever stop and wonder......

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll
squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna
eat the next thing that comes outta it's backside."

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast
to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't
point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get
undressed if they are going to look up there anyway ?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're
both dogs !

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? (This one kills me !!!!)

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables, then what is baby oil made from ?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons ?
(GWBush comes to mind here)

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same
tune?

Stop singing and read on . . . . . . . . . .

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at
you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the
window?

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

satman83 · **Joined:** Oct 2006 **Posts:** 9541 **Location:** London

ok you got me hun, am stumped

lol i think i may know some of them but but am too stupid to answer :oops:

cin · **Posted:** Fri May 18, 2007 5:26 pm

Orilana wrote:

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at
you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the
window?

that one i know.

because dogs hate bad breath.

nice list

LadyOphelia · **Joined:** Jan 2007 **Posts:** 990 **Location:** Mommyland

LMFAO.. some good stuff

K now my co-workers think I'm nuts for laughing like a looney

Stress · **Posted:** Fri May 18, 2007 5:38 pm

I liked the lethal injection part

And teh quizz one was not bad either.

[SD]bizzle · **Joined:** Jan 2006 **Posts:** 1317 **Location:** Aion

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same
tune?

Stop singing and read on . . . . . . . . . .

this one got me i felt like a fool lol, so funny

nice list

Blackchocob0 · **Joined:** Sep 2006 **Posts:** 2840 **Location:** HIV, CA

Cos we're humans. Take whatever implication you like outta that.

HyorunmarouZ · **Joined:** Mar 2007 **Posts:** 1839 **Location:** Hell.

Funny hehe baby oil, and the lethal injection

Orilana wrote:

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

At least, this can be answered: because they need to arrive safely to their target, then blow up. Though a helmet doesn't help a lot if the plane has a accident before reaching the target...

chesticles · **Joined:** May 2007 **Posts:** 1978 **Location:**

Quote:

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

My freezer has one

HyorunmarouZ · **Joined:** Mar 2007 **Posts:** 1839 **Location:** Hell.

chesticles wrote:

Quote:

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

My freezer has one

1337 h4x0r freezer

Kitty · **Joined:** Oct 2006 **Posts:** 1818 **Location:** MA/PA

draquish's favorite song

Anh_Hung_Rom · **Posted:** Fri May 18, 2007 9:59 pm

Hello_Kitty wrote:

draquish's favorite song

Black William Hung!!!

LuV3r8o1 · **Joined:** Oct 2006 **Posts:** 1194 **Location:**

Orilana wrote:

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?
Banks are assholes.

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars,
but check when you say the paint is wet?
You can't count the stars, but you can touch the paint - one you can't test, the other you can. And who said I believe them about the stars anyway?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
Do you want to handle dirty needles that have been stuck in numerous murderers?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Jane no like scruffy.

What is the speed of darkness?
Darkness is merely the absence of light. So, darkness arrives as soon as light leaves - at the speed of light.
Think of it like a train. You're standing in a single spot at the train station when a really long train passes. You can see the beginning, middle, and end of the train as it passes you. That's how light works. You can see its arrival, continuous emission, and its leave; however, its too fast for us to actually notice. So, how fast did the train leave? Depends on the speed of the train. How fast does light leave and darkness arrive? At the speed of light.

If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing
here?
To help us. Its circular. We can't do everything, so they help us.

Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem
longer?
Actually, i think they do. A study from a long time ago showed that ppl in stable relationships live longer. So, if you have a stable marriage, you'd live longer. Although, I can't remember the study, and I don't feel like Googling it (prolly wouldn't find it anyway), so just take my word for it.
Oh, btw, there's 4bil stars out there.

Do you cry under water?
Why wouldn't you? Crying shouldn't be dependent upon the moisture around you.

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in
binoculars to look at things on the ground?
They look at stuff on the ground? I always figured they looked at stuff far away. So, the height + binoculars gives you a view that can't be achieved otherwise.

Did you ever stop and wonder......

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll
squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
Good fuckin question.

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna
eat the next thing that comes outta it's backside."
See cow question, above

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast
to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
See chicken question, above.

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
I always figured the freezing temp would make the glass too brittle and weak. But then there's things like chesticles' 1337 fr33z3r h4x!

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't
point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?
I do. jk

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? (This one kills me !!!!)
*insert Butt-Head laugh*

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables, then what is baby oil made from ?
o_O

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same
tune?
Why does the French alphabet have the same tune as a military sound-off?

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
No. Technically, it should **** up the queue with so many extraneous inputs. But years of experience has led to smarter elevators. So, go ahead and press the damn button if you so desire, it does you no good.

Nuklear · **Joined:** Jun 2006 **Posts:** 3272 **Location:**

After the first 20 I stopped reading b/c they were very lame.

Draquish · **Joined:** Mar 2006 **Posts:** 6423 **Location:** ____

Hello_Kitty wrote:

draquish's favorite song

It used to be on my personalized web space.

Blackchocob0 · **Joined:** Sep 2006 **Posts:** 2840 **Location:** HIV, CA

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables, then what is baby oil made from ?
Lol I'm going to remember that. I know some people with babies who'd get a good laugh outta that.

shoto · **Joined:** Oct 2006 **Posts:** 1459 **Location:**

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as
cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

its all relative. 0 celsius is 273 kelvin so half of that...0 kelvin is absolute zero and thermally inert so there is no lower temperature.

most of these questions are answerable...

Orilana · **Joined:** Apr 2007 **Posts:** 267 **Location:**

...and it was posted for a bit of light humour. Not for a scientific explanation of them all. Lighen up lol

Blackchocob0 · **Joined:** Sep 2006 **Posts:** 2840 **Location:** HIV, CA

Dang you people whose lack of sense of humor allowed the joke part of this thread to fly right over your heads.

No shit they're answerable. All it would take is a google search to find out what baby oil is made of.

Orilana · **Joined:** Apr 2007 **Posts:** 267 **Location:**

Blackchocob0 wrote:

Dang you people whose lack of sense of humor allowed the joke part of this thread to fly right over your heads.

No shit they're answerable. All it would take is a google search to find out what baby oil is made of.

Thank you for seeing the point :wink:

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